“It’s Not About How Hard You Hit, It’s About How Hard You Can Get Hit…and Keep Moving Forward!”

Since beginning to log our journey to keep ourselves accountable there have been several ups and downs emotionally, spiritually and mindfully, and it’s only been a week!

Starting good behavior does not negate the effects of bad behavior over years. My family and I are broke because we’ve been behaving how broke people behave for way to long. Spending more than we make, not sticking to a budget, spending money meant for savings or emergencies, eating out all the time and just not paying attention took us nowhere fast. Even though we are now seeing correct mindsets and practices toward financial changes, we are not seeing the immediate results that we would like. Saying you are saving $720 a year is noticeably different than having $720 in your bank account now. Duh…It takes a year!

Time isn’t the problem, time is going by whether we like it or not. Our attitude is the problem, and we know it. We’re impatient. Most of us, if we are honest, quit when we don’t see immediate results. We’ve all heard it before, we live in a microwave society; but it’s more than that isn’t it? We live in a wifi society! We live in a microprocessor society! No more dial up! I honestly believe as a youth it may have done my character good to see the little guy on AOL frozen in time for a couple of minutes as I listened to the irritating screech and whir and hum of a dial up modem trying to connect to my mom’s old phone line. Today…I would go bananas to endure that!

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We are taught in school that sums and products are immediate answers: 1 + 1 = 2, 2 x 2 = 4 and so on. I cannot remember a time however when someone taught me 1 + a month + a week + 1 = 2, or 2 + a day + effort x 2 = 4. Time was never factored into the equations we were taught in school, but there it is…time…staring us in the face. Ten years may as well be an eternity when a person thinks of the financial peace they would like to have when it ticks by mere seconds at a time. Those seconds are also the very thing that robs a person when they sit and wait because they feel powerless, or it takes to long. People are waiting for something to happen instead of making what they desire happen over time.

Inaction and time are a troublesome combination. Passivity keeps us from setting goals and pursuing them. Because no goals are set, when hard times happen, it’s easier to sit down, throw our hands up and say “I quit.” When the bill collector calls after the mind has been set to do better, it says, “sit down, take it easy, try again tomorrow.” It is the voice that whispers, “Monday is a good start day, do it then. For now, eat a taco, you deserve it.” Tomorrow and Monday will come! Is reaching the goal any closer?

Is the destination you’d like to be at nearer? No trip is taken without a person’s mind being fixed on it. When it’s written down with an expected time line it starts to become reality. How many places have we never been to, but because Maps had a documented route and how long it took to get there, we traveled with ease? How many times have we thought about going somewhere, but weren’t truly excited until we hang up the phone after making reservations? But did we sit down and wait for vacation time? No! The trip might be a month away but we automatically started preparing for the it! How? We ask questions of what we might need. We do our research to see what kind of help may be needed while we are there. We save money, we write down the activities we want to do on our trip. We don’t sit idle! When we do sit idle, we may miss opportunities to enjoy something we otherwise would not.

“What keeps me going is goals.” Said the late Mahammad Ali. Who better to understand that if a person has goals, they will strive to meet them? muhammad-ali-in-action.jpg

People who have goals will rise up in the morning to chase them, even when it doesn’t look like there’s any hope. They will run after it even when their legs hurt, when they are miles away from their destination, when they fall down, and when a mountain is in their way. They will fight for their goals even when that mountain is ready to crush them. They are unstoppable.

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I’m sorry, can you repeat that?

A collection agency contacted me today. This major disappointment came about 11 am, right about the time I found my mojo. I remember the all to familiar lines that bill collectors spill just before they proceed to annoy you with information you more than likely already know. “This is an attempt to collect a debt and any information obtained on this call may be used expressly for that purpose…blah blah blah.”

This year has been expensive for our family as far as medical issues. I hate to admit they are mainly mine. In February I had some kind of attack where I was sure I must have had gall stones, or kidney stones, maybe even river stones, but it hurt! The trip we took to the emergency room revealed I had a “mild” case of diverticulitis. I was given antibiotics, pain killers, and an excuse to stay home from work for the next week. The bill that came along with it, after insurance, was roughly $1800, nice.

Normally, I tend to want to get my bill paying over with quickly. “Take it from savings! That’s what the emergency fund is for!” But we didn’t use our emergency bills for emergencies. We used it to pay bills over years and months because we didn’t budget. Karen shook her head because it wasn’t there, and I made payment arrangements for $104 per month and started to kill it with every extra dollar we had, but it didn’t die.

Today it sits at about $600 when my Indian friend called to inform me of his self incriminating recorded line. Then he lets me know that there’s an ADDITIONAL $1538.46 for “doctor’s services” much to my chagrin. Apparently ER facilities bill on one bill, while doctor’s services are invoiced on another. “Why do hospitals not include it all on one bill?” I ask. “Why am I just now hearing about this?” Apparently these are all questions for philosophers; for my foreign counterpart could not answer. I asked him to send me a statement via email and not to call me back between the hours of 8 am to 5 pm because he’s bugging me at work. He agreed, but not before asking me to make payment arrangements…I didn’t make payment arrangements.

billsI find there is a very primal emotion that comes about when I speak with people from collection agencies. It used to happen a lot, long before Karen and I were married. I think it may be a very natural reaction to be upset and defensive about bills a person can’t pay. There’s a very “fight or flight” mentality that comes with it. This heated reaction is exactly why I knew to get what information I could as quickly as I could and get off the phone. I’ve knowingly made payment arrangements for bills I knew couldn’t pay in the past. I wasn’t about to make another emotional decision.

After investigating, I found I do owe this bill, and I’ll pay it; but it won’t be because they backed me into a corner when I was upset about it. We can’t afford to pay it right now, “you can’t squeeze blood from a turnip,” someone once said (probably while talking to a bill collector). we have to take care of food, transportation, and housing, the basics. When a thousand dollars for emergencies  is saved in our account, this bill will be added to a debt snowball and it will be paid. Until then, I do not intend to speak to this collection agency again. Will it ruin my credit? Maybe, but right now I could care less. I don’t plan on using credit in the near future, or maybe ever. It’s not worth not taking care of my family now, and I would rather have the integrity of doing that AND paying a bill I owe, later.